Mp3 Killed the Radio Star: Since U Been Gone...

So Sanjaya finally got kicked off American Idol, and though it was inevitable, I couldn’t help but feel a little sad. No, he couldn’t sing, and no contestant benefited so much from the “vote for the worst contestant" ideology. But he was also the only contestant who was remotely memorable. I haven’t watched AI regularly this year, it's been pretty boring. But when I do tune in, I usually say to myself, “I hope I didn’t miss Sanjaya.” The anticipation of the haircut, his strained but earnest singing and a withering Simon Cowell comment, that’s pretty much the only thing I looked forward to. Now that he’s gone, there’s no one else that really screams “must watch.” Melinda Doolittle’s the best singer, but I can't see her as a popular one. I don't think anyone this season is capable of anything more than a minor single that peakes at #54 on the Billboard chart or something like that.

That could be the ultimate failure of the current season of AI because the show has proven to be, in addition to be the ratings and advertising dollar monster, a powerful launching pad for major acts. Even Daughtry last season had star power even though he tried to retain rock cred, AI voters and like Fuel at the same time. Way back in the first season, when Kelly Clarkson and Justin Guarini stood on stage as the final two, no one would’ve thought either of them would sell more than a few thousand copies of a single and album riding the coat tail. They were amateurs who appeared on a TV show, not real musicians. And that was before a flop as terrible as “From Justin to Kelly.”

But lo and behold, Clarkson actually stuck around. She managed the tricky task of both maximizing her AI popularity while avoiding the dreaded “reality product” tag with a formula other AI grads used to launch their careers, produce monster singles. I didn’t think Clarkson had a lot of staying power, she was dull for a pop star and “A Moment Like This” was terrible. But she could sing, and as we later found out, she had a good ear for songs. I’ll admit I didn’t give Breakaway a fair listen at first. But damn if I haven’t sung along to “Since U Been Gone,” “Behind These Hazel Eyes” or any of the other songs in my car or a karaoke bar. They pulled off an act I thought was impossible; updated 80’s arena rock and made it relevant for today. In 2004 and 2005, Clarkson truly was the greatest singles artist on Earth

So one can only guess the palpable excitement I and a few others felt when her new single “Never Again” leaked. And it sounds like the quintessential sophomore-album song, indulgent and self-centered. I don’t know why so many pop artists feel like they have to produce the personal statement when afforded the chance, cuz a lot of them aren’t capable of it. I don’t know anyone who’ll get excited by the opening lyric, “I hope the ring you gave to her turns her finger green.” Even for a breakup song, that’s grade-school terrible. The big chorus, it’s just a long string of accusatory rants, except set to pop-metal guitars and a semi-catchy chorus. What’s really disappointing is that “Never Again” sticks to the exact same musical formula as all her other singles, and that just invites natural comparisons to those songs. She just crams as much angry poetry as she can into the same type of song. “Never Again” sounds like a messier, less coherent “Since U Been Gone” because that’s exactly what it is.

I read on some British music blog, I think it was Stylus, that Europeans produce better pop music because they’re not afraid of it’s inherent cheesiness while Americans feel like they have to be taken seriously eventually. Then the writer threw out Kylie Minogue, who was comfortable with “Lo-co-motion” and a career of nothing but modest pop singles until she honed her craft into “Can’t Get You Out of My Head.” Meanwhile, Madonna stuck burning crosses into a video and just descended from their into “Evita” and what-not. Only when she re-embraced club culture (softly) with Ray of Light, then Music did her career see an uptick before she actually moved to London and adopted a fake accent. But Christina Aguilera made her big I'm-an-artist-so-I-can-release-a-double-album statement, Rihanna’s upcoming album is supposedly more mature and loaded with mid-tempo songs and it looks like Clarkson is attempting her serious artistic statement. It’s not like pop singers should never try, but “Never Again” just isn’t good enough. It’s too focused on being a cathartic release and not focused enough on being a good song. It's just one song though, hopefully she didn't forget to drop in some quality pop anthems in her upcoming album. But that album's title, My December, sounds an awful lot like a journal entry.