Yet Another American Idol Live-Blog (Tuesday)

I didn't want to do a live blog because everyone does it. Except it's easy, takes minimal thought and it's instantaneous. No wonder everyone does it. So without further ado...

- “100,000 has been whittled down to two,” Ryan ominously says at the beginning. Hmm, did I missed the “300”-themed night on AI.
- Why is Randy wearing Forest Whitaker’s costume from “The Last King of Scotland?”
- “Did they fix your nose,” Ryan asks Paula. Awkward silence Ryan keeps asking about the nose. Paula for once, doesn’t want to talk. And, did Ryan just call Paula's dog a "bitch?!"

- Portland gets Greg Oden, Seattle gets Kevin Durant, both Idols finalist are from the Seattle audition and now the songwriting winner is from Seattle. Further proof that David Stern hates the city of Boston.
- No matter what the outcome, Blake can be thankful for a less homosexual haircut..
- Blake starts with his “controversial” rendition of “You Give Love A Bad Name,” now with more beatbox scractches! Somewhere, Bon Jovi weeps through his bangs. Somewhere, the casting director of the "Police Academy" remake (note: it’s actually in pre-production) found his Sgt. Jones.
- Broken nose and blocked windpipe relegates Paula to ramble “10+, 10+, 10+” Seriously, did Idol producers plant that dog for the finale?
- Simon neatly sums up Blake’s appeal; he can’t sing, but he’s also the best performer of the bunch.
- Hey, I just realized Jordin’s dad played for the New York Giants.
- Jordin sings “Fighter,” which is a terrible choice for her. She doesn’t have the personality or voice to fill the song. Wow, that rendition was flat.
- Randy loves it? Paula wheezes out some niceties Simon correctly calls out Jordin for a terrible song choice and flat rendition.

- We now know Blake’s dad is the man to blame for making beat-box inexplicably cool again when he bought Blake a drum set.
- Blake tries a different Maroon 5 song with “She Will Be Loved.” Why is he trying to sing? If this turns into a quote, unquote "singing competition," Blake's at a disadvantage. He should stick to what got him here, goofy beatboxing and white boy charm.

- Jordin does Martina McBride’s “Broken Wing” and nails it. She can sing big songs that doesn’t require her to fill in with her personality. These type of songs are perfect for her.
- I think they’re cutting off Paula’s mic halfway through her comments.
- Blake must wonder why the songwriting winner is a torch ballad. It’s the one song he can’t sing and it’s the one song Jordin can do well on.
- Blake can’t sing. The judges know it, the audience knows it and by now, Blake knows it. He’s struggling to finish the song, stumbling around the stage haphazardly.
- Randy’s diplomatic. I have no idea what Paula said. Simon is also diplomatic, calling the performance odd and asking the voters to disregard it. If you’re performance garners pity from Simon, you know it’s no good.
- Predictably, Jordin does much better with this song. Just OK, not great, but it’s more than enough compared to Blake.
- Aww, tears. Randy calls Jordin’s performance “fire,” officially retiring that phrase from the hip-hop lexicon.
- “It is a singing competition,” I waited all night for that catchphrase, but it's not a good sign for Blake if this turns into a singing competition. Simon’s right though, Jordin waxed Blake in this competition. Melinda would’ve waxed the floor with both of them though. Damn, I've got to move on.
- Chris Daughtry, who’s debut album outsold the combine total of the four contestants who finished above him last year, reminds everyone that a vote for the Idol's winner is truly meaningless.
- On the Lot starts immediately after AI, so viewers can roll into it. 50 contestants from 33 countries come to Los Angeles to see the plane crash set from “War of the World?” Oh yeah, Spielberg’s an executive producer.
- Maybe I’ll watch this show too. I liked Project Greenlight and, dear Lord, is Chelsea Handler hosting the show? Fuck it, I’m going to Del Taco. Until tomorrow’s result show, good night.